Sung to a tune that only I know, to be released in the future one day after it's complete. Just posting a line or two before I forget it.
Ahem.
They promised me-...
Eternal rest-...
As they carried me-...
In a wooden chest-;
They lowered me-...
Without a sound-...
They buried me-...
Deep in-the-ground-;
Alone I lay-...
What's passed is past-...
There's no prayers today-...
Only curses cast-;
My thoughts do stray-...
As I recall-...
In the spot I lay-...
The time of my fall-;
There's no hope of release-...
No hope on the 'rizon (horizon)-...
Where should there be peace-...
Is only anger a-risin'-;
I
Feel
My
RAGE
In-side of me...
Stru-ggli-ing...
As it builds in-ten-si-ty...
No one will ever know
As long as I never show
The hate, the pain, the fear inside of me-...;
Eyes through stone will ever sting-...
Their eyes I'll ever feel-...
Their lies and harsh words ring-...
Past regrets will never heal-;
They buried dead a living man-...
A man in life who had never lived-...
A pawn in some great master plan-...
As a stone squeezed 'til he gived-;
You can't give when there's nothing there-...
Such lies come ea-si-ly-...
It's too damn hard when you don't want to care-...
When it's a part of me-;
Abused in life and abused in death-...
The price of vengeance they'll pay-...
I curse out loud with my final breath-...
I don't want to stay!-;
But here I am chained to our world-...
A hollow mo-(o)ck-ery-...
It seems my dreams lay un-furled-...
................
Dammit. Lost it. SOMEONE upstairs is playing some god-damned Disney fucking sing-a-long retro-crap from some god-forsaken dead era of happy-crappy family dance-a-long tappity-tap-tap crap piece of #^%$ blarghh!!!!!
I had a few more lines to go. Nothing seems to fit the way I want it to. Like I said, these are just tid-bits of half-baked ideas that one day in the future I plan on weaving into this dirge-metal song I'm privately working on in the depths of my head. Only, the really good stuff is lost when I get an idea at 4:30 in the morning with no pen/paper/lights/glasses nearby and I manage to easily pass out and go back to sleep (something I can't do the rest of the time, ^THANK YOU^ God...). Or, my ideas are lost when some other piece of crap music is played, you know, the REEEEEEEELLLLLLLYYYYYYYYY ANNNNOYYYYYYYYINGGGGGG stuff, like little Annie yuppie-bitch movies that their playing upstairs. You want to know why there's pedophiles in the world people? It's because some fuck-heads were forced to watch little orphan Annie dress up in tiny little skirt-dress thingies and act grown-up and kiss adult men on the Disney-fucking movies. Fuck you Walt Disney, not the man (who is awesome by the way), no. A big FUCK YOU to Walt Disney the MEGA-FUCKWAD-CORPORATION that makes these annoying movies like, oh, I don't know... Bambi 3, or Pinnochio Ripoff 5, ^SHREK^ (<-Blam this piece of crap!), the re-re-re-re-re released version of, omfg, CINDERELLA! (Viewers note: old Disney stuff is great, very few of the newer stuff is ho-hum almost okay, anything that was made in uder a month like Cars or Shrek is shit. Your opinion doesn't matter, my words are truth. Shrek is shit, period. Don't like it, fuck off. Shrek is shit. Period. Thank you, have a wonderful day. P.S. Kill Shrek.).
Ugh. Disney. Yes, I have a serious dislike of most Disney movies. You want a good Disney movie? I seriously recommend Pirates of the Carribean, Anastasia, and if you can find it, an old humourous goodie called The Black Cauldron.
Anyways. My up-above-posted poetry thingie is not a reflection of my current mood. Everything is fine. My job is stressful, but it's all good. I just had a few wicked ideas to jot down, and then a few more, and a few more, and bam. I'm suddenly blamming Disney crap. Heh heh, please excuse my 'innappropriate' language :P.
I haven't finished uploading all of my vacation videos onto Google video like I said I would. I still have them of course, I just haven't posted them onto the net yet. It's coming, this summer, I promise. Not today though.
My good friend Shawn Harding is blabbing stuff now... Can't focus... lost-... in-... blabber-bullshit-... helppppp.....
Will talk later.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
I've been too busy to post folks.
http://www.freewebs.com/autumnbear/
Here's the address to my Freewebs web-page. Feel free to browse. I plan on making this a clickable link on this blog-sites' sidebar, but I don't have time right now to post it.
Later peeps! O_x
Here's the address to my Freewebs web-page. Feel free to browse. I plan on making this a clickable link on this blog-sites' sidebar, but I don't have time right now to post it.
Later peeps! O_x
Thursday, June 14, 2007
My first night shift...
Cooool...
I think I actually prefer night shifts. Really.
First of all, even in summer, there's a whole hell of a lot less people in your store. You can just catch up on a lot of the missed daily chores and get them done with.
Second, there's much more important tasks to do. Such as recieving stock, inventory, cash-out, pay-roll for the day shift guys, write-offs, and ordering stuff. You don't have to run around like a chicken with it's head cut off at night. If it gets busy, so what. You can deal with the people, and expect a moment of silence after, unlike day-shift. You know there's not many people up at 3am on a school/work week.
I even got to shoo away a few loiterers in front of our store last night. No Loitering peoples!
Plus the roads are quieter, the store is quieter, and I like the night more than the day anyway. Seems like a win-win situation.
It's strange that no-one else seems to like night-shift. The boss asked me how it went last night, and I said I loved it. She did a double-take and seemed quite pleased and shocked that I'm willing to work nights. All I have to do is master all the paper-work and I'm in the clear.
That's all for now. Later peeps! O_x
I think I actually prefer night shifts. Really.
First of all, even in summer, there's a whole hell of a lot less people in your store. You can just catch up on a lot of the missed daily chores and get them done with.
Second, there's much more important tasks to do. Such as recieving stock, inventory, cash-out, pay-roll for the day shift guys, write-offs, and ordering stuff. You don't have to run around like a chicken with it's head cut off at night. If it gets busy, so what. You can deal with the people, and expect a moment of silence after, unlike day-shift. You know there's not many people up at 3am on a school/work week.
I even got to shoo away a few loiterers in front of our store last night. No Loitering peoples!
Plus the roads are quieter, the store is quieter, and I like the night more than the day anyway. Seems like a win-win situation.
It's strange that no-one else seems to like night-shift. The boss asked me how it went last night, and I said I loved it. She did a double-take and seemed quite pleased and shocked that I'm willing to work nights. All I have to do is master all the paper-work and I'm in the clear.
That's all for now. Later peeps! O_x
Saturday, June 9, 2007
Yesterday was hell...
It was only a 14 hour shift, but I work my ass off everyday, and yesterday I wasn't able to do my many jobs easily. Not at all.
I was half-way through my regular 8 hour shift when we found out one of the lazy girls for the evening wasn't coming in. My supervisor/assistant/trainer asked me if I could stay late. I said sure, but no more than 6 hours. Whatever, I don't mind. Yesterday was Friday, a busy day, and as soon as my regular shift was starting to end, total chaos ensued. Hordes of non-stop people came in. ALL EVENING. I couldn't keep the coffees and cups full. We had people waiting in line to pay for fuel. I had kids stealing candy (not my fault, actually it's my trainer's fault, SHE didn't stop them when she saw them), I was scammed out of 20 bucks by a guy who said he gave me two 20's when he only gave me one: I told him whatever and paid the loss out of my own, the argument was getting ugly. I saw him and his girlfriend laughing about it in their truck as I tended to a long line of customers. Asshole. Whenever I DID get a break, it was a rush to mop a spill, or restock this and that, or count the tills. I made a few clerical errors throughout the day, and I have computer problems with their ticket machines and price codes. I did pretty good for a second day, but it was one hell of a long day.
So after that 7am-3pm shift, plus 3pm to 9pm that night for the overtime, I was supposed to drive home, shower, eat, shave, wash my uniform, and somehow sleep after a stressful day and wake up for the next morning at 7am rested and ready to go. Ten hours to do all that. Well, less than ten, since I have to account for the travel time in the morning, and gassing up, and the fact that I don't easily shut-down and sleep on a normal day.
On a lighter note, today went by almost flawlessly. I had one error today, a mistake when I forgot to charge fuel to a persons order. Thanks to their honesty I was able to go through with the order, but it did make me look kind of bad at the time. All I can do in that situation is brandish my 'In Training' badge and smile like an idiot. :)
I was half-way through my regular 8 hour shift when we found out one of the lazy girls for the evening wasn't coming in. My supervisor/assistant/trainer asked me if I could stay late. I said sure, but no more than 6 hours. Whatever, I don't mind. Yesterday was Friday, a busy day, and as soon as my regular shift was starting to end, total chaos ensued. Hordes of non-stop people came in. ALL EVENING. I couldn't keep the coffees and cups full. We had people waiting in line to pay for fuel. I had kids stealing candy (not my fault, actually it's my trainer's fault, SHE didn't stop them when she saw them), I was scammed out of 20 bucks by a guy who said he gave me two 20's when he only gave me one: I told him whatever and paid the loss out of my own, the argument was getting ugly. I saw him and his girlfriend laughing about it in their truck as I tended to a long line of customers. Asshole. Whenever I DID get a break, it was a rush to mop a spill, or restock this and that, or count the tills. I made a few clerical errors throughout the day, and I have computer problems with their ticket machines and price codes. I did pretty good for a second day, but it was one hell of a long day.
So after that 7am-3pm shift, plus 3pm to 9pm that night for the overtime, I was supposed to drive home, shower, eat, shave, wash my uniform, and somehow sleep after a stressful day and wake up for the next morning at 7am rested and ready to go. Ten hours to do all that. Well, less than ten, since I have to account for the travel time in the morning, and gassing up, and the fact that I don't easily shut-down and sleep on a normal day.
On a lighter note, today went by almost flawlessly. I had one error today, a mistake when I forgot to charge fuel to a persons order. Thanks to their honesty I was able to go through with the order, but it did make me look kind of bad at the time. All I can do in that situation is brandish my 'In Training' badge and smile like an idiot. :)
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
First day on the job, not so bad...
Yup. I worked for a whole 6 hours today.
The sad thing is, it wasn't really work at all.
It was training.
I had to sit in their tiny little back-office, which makes broom-closet cubicals look big. While outside and in the store was bathed in scorching dry prairie heat, I froze my teats off in that tiny room working at a computer. Six hours straight of these poorly made flash quizzes and tutorials. Their computer blows, and makes Maryannes computer in Blackfalds look like a Pentium 8.
So I just sat there today, listening and watching and interacting with this slow, piece of crap computer, trying to learn the ropes for this convenience store. After watching the tutorials, I've noticed that there's a lot wrong with the people who currently run it.
They eat at the cashier stand. They have long fake nails with polish on it. They smoke in front of the windows. And spilled slurpees are not immediately cleaned up. Just because they're under-staffed doesn't mean they can run a store so poorly. Thank god I have at least a little ethics left in me.
The cashier is supposed to be simplistic, but I'm not used to working with traveler cheques, foreign money, or those fake wanna-be credit cards that you buy from the counter and 'load' with money. I can understand how to use coupons and promotions now, and I can even cancel transactions and refund money too.
I work all week, each morning at 8am till whenever my shift ends. I was finished at 2pm today. I chose to take no breaks and no lunch. I just want to finish this computer training crap and get to work.
I'm getting paid for todays' training. I stopped by my bank and asked for my bank account number and a permission form for 7-11 to direct deposit my pay into my chequing account.
Oh yeah. After stopping by the bank after work today I stopped at Wal-Mart. I bought a few shirts, a flexable exercise bar (for raging pectoral muscles), and some kitty crap.
After a hard day of work, and spending money I don't have yet (thank YOU credit card gods!) I decided to shave my head and shower. Yup. I now have a military-style buzzcut, self-made, and now I look like one of those Rent-A-Cop security dudes. No beard, just a big, bad-assed moustachio.
Not much time to do anything this evening. I may as well crash early tonight.
Later peeps. O_x
The sad thing is, it wasn't really work at all.
It was training.
I had to sit in their tiny little back-office, which makes broom-closet cubicals look big. While outside and in the store was bathed in scorching dry prairie heat, I froze my teats off in that tiny room working at a computer. Six hours straight of these poorly made flash quizzes and tutorials. Their computer blows, and makes Maryannes computer in Blackfalds look like a Pentium 8.
So I just sat there today, listening and watching and interacting with this slow, piece of crap computer, trying to learn the ropes for this convenience store. After watching the tutorials, I've noticed that there's a lot wrong with the people who currently run it.
They eat at the cashier stand. They have long fake nails with polish on it. They smoke in front of the windows. And spilled slurpees are not immediately cleaned up. Just because they're under-staffed doesn't mean they can run a store so poorly. Thank god I have at least a little ethics left in me.
The cashier is supposed to be simplistic, but I'm not used to working with traveler cheques, foreign money, or those fake wanna-be credit cards that you buy from the counter and 'load' with money. I can understand how to use coupons and promotions now, and I can even cancel transactions and refund money too.
I work all week, each morning at 8am till whenever my shift ends. I was finished at 2pm today. I chose to take no breaks and no lunch. I just want to finish this computer training crap and get to work.
I'm getting paid for todays' training. I stopped by my bank and asked for my bank account number and a permission form for 7-11 to direct deposit my pay into my chequing account.
Oh yeah. After stopping by the bank after work today I stopped at Wal-Mart. I bought a few shirts, a flexable exercise bar (for raging pectoral muscles), and some kitty crap.
After a hard day of work, and spending money I don't have yet (thank YOU credit card gods!) I decided to shave my head and shower. Yup. I now have a military-style buzzcut, self-made, and now I look like one of those Rent-A-Cop security dudes. No beard, just a big, bad-assed moustachio.
Not much time to do anything this evening. I may as well crash early tonight.
Later peeps. O_x
Monday, June 4, 2007
Looks like I have a job now...
Tomorrow morning at 8am I am scheduled to go to 7-11 and start my training. I'll have to mess around on their computer for a time and do a quick test. I'm pretty much scheduled to work the rest of the week starting at 8am each morning.
I hope I don't hate this job too much. I really don't want to have to resort to working for Pro-Temp again.
I hope I don't hate this job too much. I really don't want to have to resort to working for Pro-Temp again.
Sunday, June 3, 2007
I'm a Dictator now. Muahahaha!
http://www.nationstates.net/autumnbear
I'm in charge of a nation now. Scary, isn't it? O_x
I'm in charge of a nation now. Scary, isn't it? O_x
Saturday, June 2, 2007
Zombies and Vampires
http://www.urbandead.com/index.html
http://quiz.ravenblack.net/blood.pl?biter=Kevan
Two cool games I play online. Very strategic, and very cool. You're limited with a certain amount of action points, which slowly replenish over time. Each move costs an action point, and each mistake has a huge impact on your game.
I spent 20 dollars to have my four Urbandead characters have unlimited access to the server. For free-members, they can only refresh or access each server page a limited number of times before they're denied access for the day. I kind of HAD to pay in order to play my four Urbandead characters, each with 50 daily action points, for a server that cuts you off at 180 actions or page accesses a day. A one time cost, and a sound investment. It made me happy. :)
Ooh, naughty! O_x
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